Bad Parents - Should They Be Against the Law?

We've all seen it. We've been out to eat at a restaurant, dining with our significant other, and watched as a 4-year-old runs all over the place, getting in the waitress' way and generally making your dinner hell through all of the commotion.

You look at each other and say "Where are the parents?" or "Where's the mom?" (Funny how we never say "Where's the dad?", eh?) Some might even say "there oughtta be a law."

But really, should there be?

Do we really want to go there?

Marybeth Hicks over on Ricochet (lots of good stuff over there) asks the questions: Are we free to be lousy parents?

As she states at the beginning of her post, there is a difference between "bad" parents and parents who *should* be prosecuted, such as abusive or neglectful parents who victimize their kids.

We're talking the "bad" category here.

Many good points are made in the post or in the comments, including this one: For those of you who think there *should* be laws about bad parents, who's going to make the decision? You? Me? Some government bureaucrat who takes a kid away because the new mother had a poppy seed bagel? Do you really want the government making those kinds of decisions? It screws up the ones it *should* be making!

"And what about that poor kid of his? It's not the child's fault that he was unlucky enough to be born to a stinky father. Shouldn't someone rescue him?

Here's the rub: This is the mentality that is bringing us legislation such as that in Louisiana which took effect last week, requiring schools to refer to the state's Department of Families and Children any parent who is at least three days in arrears in payments for school lunches. (Read more about it here)."

One commenter also says that these kids, and these parents, shouldn't be given a pass. I agree with that. We, as a society, should speak up. But the government?

Also keep in mind that we are seeing just a snapshot of the child's behaviour. We are not seeing the whole picture.

A commenter makes this point:

"I have 4 kids and each presents different challenges. Eventually you are going to have to pick your battles and concede some.

If you catch me conceeding one and that's all you see, you might mistake me for a bad parent. But you don't know of the 100 battles I won before that time."

In addition, there might be other reasons the child's misbehaving, as one of my blogging friends knows very intimately. We just don't know when we only see a 30-minute block out of that child's life.

To somebody like me, who will never be a parent, this comes down to a societal issue: Do we want the government actually determining who is a good and a bad parent?

That's not a slippery slope. That's an avalanche.

(Don't worry. I will get off this Nanny State issue soon. There's just been so much in the news recently. I'll try to make my next post more fun)