You Don't Know Jack

A "Dis or Dat" answer

No, I'm not insulting you.

Instead, I'm introducing you to a really fun trivia game that's currently on Facebook and is on its way to Android and iOS devices.

You Don't Know Jack is a long and storied trivia franchise on the PC, but I never played it until the last version came out on consoles. It was really nicely-priced at $30, but I guess it didn't do very well.

Then Jellyvision Games hit the mother lode: Facebook!!!

Now You Don't Know Jack is one of the few Facebook games I play every day.

The game is hosted by a character named Cookie Masterson, and his jokes are usually pretty funny. Or at least amusing if nothing else. He welcomes you to the show with things like this one that I heard on the game I played today (paraphrased from memory):

"Hi, this is Cookie, and I'll be with you after I file a complaint about this truck driver. Let's see, 1-800.....E....A....T...S...H...Hey!!!!"

Each game consists of five questions, which can either be straight trivia questions, a Dis or Dat (where he gives you seven things and you tell him which of two choices each thing is a member of), a gibberish question (where you are given a gibberish phrase and you say what TV show, saying, or something else that it rhymes with), or several other ideas. The fifth question is the Jack Attack, where you have to make the best match possible.

A basic question asked in Cookie's unusual way

Even the straight trivia questions are asked in a rather unique way, which occasionally (though not too often) masks what exactly Cookie was asking. For example, one of today's questions was asking how you could text your friend that you're at a KISS concert, and the answer was the emoticon for a kiss. For some reason, I wasn't making the connection.

Most of the time, it makes sense with a little thought. But that doesn't mean you'll know the answer.

One strike against the game for some people (at least one of my friends for example) is that the game insults you when you get a question wrong. If you find humour in that sort of thing, you'll love the game. If you find it condescending and annoying, then you should probably stay far away from the game. Personally, I can take it and I find it hilarious, especially the play on words that's often involved. In the "Elephant, Mustard, Teddy Roosevelt or Dracula" questions (where one of the answers is always one of those things), if you choose Dracula and it's wrong, Cookie will say "That answer sucks!" Get it? Dracula sucks your blood?

Ah, never mind.

Anyway, the Facebook game (and I assume the mobile device ones too, when they come out)gives a nice feeling of playing opponents online even though you're really not. The game will randomly assign you five "opponents" who have already played the round you're playing. They're scores and answers are recorded, so you're playing against them. You don't get to see their answers (except in the Jack Attack and Gibberish questions), but you do see their scores.

No matter where you place (1st through 6th), you will always receive a certain number of tokens. You can play the game once a day for free, and then each play after that is 200 tokens. You can buy more tokens to play more often, or you can earn tokens doing various things that the game will tell you about. I play when I can, at least once a day, and earn tokens to play more games. I have never purchased anything.

Thus, if you're against having to pay for your games, you certainly don't have to. But you can if you wish to play more often. It's a win-win as far as I'm concerned.

You have to have a certain sense of humour, but if you do, You Don't Know Jack is an awesome trivia game. It's funny, and I for one have never had so much fun feeling stupid at times.

Really, who knows the three "official" types of hail descriptions anyway?

(not meatball, just so you know)