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August 5, 2013

If I Ruled the World

Thanks to Alexsh on Wikimedia Commons
I was at the 7-11 the other day, doing a slurpee run (that means a run to get a slurpee, not actually running with a slurpee, or running for a free one, or anything like that). I've been to this 7-11 many times, and there usually may be a couple of people in line but that's about it.

For some reason, this time was different. There was a line at the cash register that reached almost to the back of the store. What was going on? Was the circus in town? It wasn't particularly hot, but there was a big mess of paper (the straw wrappers) around the slurpee machine, so maybe there was some sort of promotion?

I don't know. All I know was that I was waiting in line while these slow people in front of me picked through their cash and tried to find the proper amount of money to pay for their stuff. I was being assaulted by the smells of the hot dogs, sausages, and other questionable materials cycling through on that rotating warmer, looking like they'd been there all day (and probably tasting like it too). Usually that's not bad because I'm not there long. Today? It was getting annoying.

Why was I waiting in line like this? I had exact change. Almost every time I'm there, I have my coins all ready. I just hand them to the cashier and am on my way. No change necessary.

But no. Instead, I'm stuck waiting behind these slowpokes.

So, as it is wont to do, my mind started wandering.

They should invent something so that people who actually do have their money ready, and have exact change, should be able to just glide on through without waiting. Some kind of automatic "deposit exact change here" thing were you can walk by those teaming hordes standing in line, smile at them as you put your money in, and be on your way.

I've thought about this too when I'm in a similar situation but with only one person. I'm behind a person who doesn't seem to realize that, "oh, I'm at the cash register. I might actually have to provide money!" And then (if it's a woman) she starts digging through her purse trying to find it all. Or she starts counting out the pennies to get to two dollars. Meanwhile, I'm standing behind her with places to be, holding the exact change for my item, ready to just hand it to the cashier and be on my way.

Wouldn't that make life a lot easier for those of us who are efficient?

Ok, I'm not an efficient person. I often find the hard way to do things, and am flabbergasted when the easy way is pointed out to me. "Why didn't I think of that?" If there's a round hole, I'm sure I have the square peg that will fit in there. I mentally go three miles out of my way to accomplish something that would only take about 500 feet. I miss things that are sitting right in front of me. If there's an easy way to do it, I will probably not be able to find it.

So in one of those rare cases where I'm actually ready to be efficient, shouldn't I be rewarded?

Evidently not.

It's like that a lot in life, I think. Things that, if I ran the world, these things would be happening.

Like getting off an airplane.

Isn't that one of the most annoying things out there? You have one carry-on bag, and it's underneath your seat. You could literally be up and out of there in 5 seconds, getting out of everybody's way. You're all ready to go, but you have to sit there for what seems like hours (ok, it's probably just five minutes max, but it feels like hours).

But no. You have to wait for all of the people in front of you who are having trouble getting their bags out of the overhead bins. A family of six who are trying to get everything together. Meanwhile, you're sitting there, bag in hand, ready to go, wishing you could just wave your fingers and "zap!" you're at baggage claim or at your connecting gate.

You could be out of their hair in seconds, so that the people behind you aren't waiting for you.

If I ruled the world, the flight attendants would be at the front of the plane, and they would announce "those of you who are all ready to leave may disembark first. Thank you for flying with us. Those of you who are slow, please wait your turn."

It would make things a lot easier.

If you ran the world, what things would you implement to make your life easier? Or to make it more efficient?

And if you're the person in front of me, have your damned money ready!


  1. I think that is the reason for the self check out lanes (not sure if you have those up north). I can get through that think in 2 minutes. Can I also add that the airlines need to load the plane back to front. I'm sure first class passengers don't care if other passengers get on first. It isn't like the plane is gonna leave without anyone. Makes no sense.

    1. I don't think they're as widespread up here yet, though we do have them at Canadian Tire, one of our major retailers. Sometimes those are counter-intuitive and picky, though. "Please remove the item and place it in the bag." "I don't want a bag, you ##%!%!%!!!!!"

      And yes! I fully agree with you on airplane boarding as well. It's not like they are going to miss out on their seat because they didn't get on first. Though I suppose one of the perks you're paying for is the ability to get on and get settled before others start coming on.

      But still...

  2. Did your Slurpee melt while you were waiting?

    1. LOL actually, no it didn't. But it could have!


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