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April 11, 2010

One Hit Wonders of the 90s (Part 9)

Hello, dear reader. I have a favour to ask you. The original post begins after all of the asterisks, if you want to skip this.

Now that the One Hit Wonders of the 90s series is over, I'm not going to be doing my weekly revisiting of all these posts (I had to do that to add the new post to the bottom). Thus, I won't be able to catch any broken picture links or deleted videos any more. Yet I want these posts to be as good as possible.

Please, if you happen upon one of these posts, or if you take a walk through a whole bunch of them, let me know if you find anything that doesn't work. You can leave a comment, or you can send me a message using that handy "Contact Me" page linked above.

Also, feel free to let me know what you think of the post or any of the videos!

Thank you.


The sun is out. The Canucks are in the NHL Playoffs, our TV is back, and that nasty rash has cleared up...

Um, forget that last part.

It's time for this week's one-hit wonders of the 90s post! As we stagger drunkenly into 1992 (and c'mon, you know you did), we're going to go at a bit slower pace (otherwise, we'll probably puke against the wall, and you know you don't want to see that). New Year's Eve, 1991 was the first New Year's Eve that I could enjoy "legally" (what an esoteric concept), and I could finally enjoy all of these dance songs in their proper environment! I didn't, but the difference was that I could have. Yes, I had no life.

I think my fear of dance clubs came about when I saw this:

I was scarred for life!

So on we go into 1992! With courage and belligerence, where most fear to tread! I will guide you, so do not be afraid (Peanut Gallery: "Be terrified, as he has no survival skills.") I will keep the nasty rappers away from you (me, and that little "stop" button on the video that you can click even when I don't allow myself to). Together, we will venture into the Great Unknown!

Ok, actually, anybody who lived through it will know, but THAT'S NOT THE POINT!

As always, you can see the list I'm taking these from here, but you'd better not. You don't know what's guarding it.

Ok, he's a little blind...

On to #1!

1) Angelica: "Angel Baby" (#29)

Whew! Hey, no Spanish! This is an English-only list.

Hot way to start the year, though the singing voice doesn't turn me on too much (good thing others things do...). I am starting to go into sugar overload as I listen to this song, which can't be good for my health. Doctors say that the maximum Angelica per day is 50 grams, and even *she* weighs more than that. Good thing she only hit the charts once, or there would be a LOT of sick people out there!

2) The Party: "In My Dreams" (#34)

Oh, now I remember this song! Or at least the beginning of it.

That floor must be electrified! Or a couple of those guys are having seizures. Thankfully, the women can dance. And somebody took a weed-whacker to their hair, too. Wow, that must have been some industrial accident.

This song definitely has that 80s vibe and gets the toe tapping a bit as well. The Party was formed from the cast members of Disney Channel's Mickey Mouse Club, so I really wanted to see a breakdancing Donald Duck in the background of the video, but sadly nothing like that happened.

It's sad when dreams are unfulfilled.

I'm sorry, but it's JUST NOT THE SAME.


3) The Storm: "I've Got a Lot to Learn About Love" (#26)

This song sounds vaguely familiar, but it doesn't trip the memory triggers too much. Probably because I'm getting it mixed up with a lot of the other same types of bands. It really does blend in with the other bands at this time, doesn't it? I'm getting Def Leppard, Winger, and the like flashbacks. There's just nothing distinctive about it at all.

And since one-hit wonder status is pretty common too, they're not very distinctive when it comes to that either.

4) Kym Sims: "Too Blind to See It" (#38)

Sadly, Sims left us when she got those earrings stuck in a conveyor belt and...well, let's just say that it wasn't pretty.

I mean, seriously...those are like hula hoops! Ok, hula hoops for Kate Moss.

This is rather boring for a dance song, isn't it? I guess when you're drunk out of your mind, staggering on the dance floor and getting your hands all over a similarly drunk woman and trying to dance to this, it *might* get your feet moving a little bit.

Maybe with 500 volts going through you too. That might help.

5) Right Said Fred: "I'm Too Sexy" (#1)

Finally! A great song on this list. You can almost see them laughing at themselves and having great fun with it. You obviously have to look at it in the right vein or else you'll think this is horrible. It's also a good thing the guy's built for it, or else it wouldn't nearly be as hilarious.

This was my theme song in college, though in retrospect, getting up in front of my History class while the professor was talking and strutting my stuff probably wasn't my brightest idea.

Oh, and I'm *still* too sexy for my cat. So there.

6) A Lighter Shade of Brown: "One Sunday Afternoon" (#39)

Is he old enough to *shave*, much less drink? Keep the woman singing, and ditch the rap! She's not bad.

Actually, for a rap, this song isn't bad. And when I say that, I mean that it only makes me want to put cotton in my ears instead of poking my ear drums out.

So that's progress.

7) The Shamen: "Move Any Mountain (Progen 91)" (#38)

The Shamen - Move Any Mountain
Uploaded by Hakunamatata67. - See the latest featured music videos.

Woohoo!! 80s psychedelic!!!! Did this video cost more than $500? It doesn't look it. Actually, the video effects might have been expensive back then, I don't know. But nowadays, I would think you could do that easily with a computer. Anyway, we once again flash back to 80s pop dance music, and we do so in an extremely silly fashion. With dance moves inspired by the Nantucket Nerds Society (Chapter 201) and repetitive lyrics that seep into your brain and then start burrowing to the core until you start screaming (or starting to like William Hung because you think he actually sings well), you know you've got the true definition of a one-hit wonder.

Funnily enough, only one of the first seven songs got any higher than #26 on the charts. Ironic that it's the only good song on the list, too. It seems that early 1992 was not a good time for an artist to hit it big and then disappear with the millions earned from royalties.

Yes, that means that there is a God.

We've come to an end of Part 1 for 1992 (or Part 9 for the whole thing). Since there are only 28 one-hit wonders in 1992, I've decided to go for an even split of seven each week for four weeks.

And I have to say that today's list has inspired me!

Hey, I didn't say what it had inspired me to do.

One-Hit Wonders of the 90s
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
Part 8
Part 9
Part 10
Part 11
Part 12
Part 13
Part 14
Part 15
Part 16
Part 17
Part 18
Part 19
Part 20
Part 21
Part 22
Part 23
Part 24
Part 25
Part 26
Part 27
Part 28
Part 29
Part 30
Part 31
Part 32
Part 33
Part 34
Part 35
Part 36
Part 37
Part 38
Part 39
Part 40


  1. Can't say much for this weeks songs. I did know number 5 but that's all. The video's were enough to give you a headache. Maybe next week will be better.

  2. Wow Angelica's voice is annoying. How did she land a record deal?

    #2 doesn't ring a bell but definitely something I would be listening to. Kind of reminds me of Fun Factory a bit.

    I only remember #5.

  3. Mom: I doubt they'll be better, but I've heard optimism is healthy!

    Anahid: I'm not surprised that #5 is all you remember either. These were pretty nondescript, weren't they? Glad you agree with me on Angelica, too. :)

  4. Right said Fred - now you are talking - they've even got the same hair as me!!

  5. So I'll bet you're too sexy for your cat too, then?


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