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April 18, 2010

One Hit Wonders of the 90s (Part 10)

Hello, dear reader. I have a favour to ask you. The original post begins after all of the asterisks, if you want to skip this.

Now that the One Hit Wonders of the 90s series is over, I'm not going to be doing my weekly revisiting of all these posts (I had to do that to add the new post to the bottom). Thus, I won't be able to catch any broken picture links or deleted videos any more. Yet I want these posts to be as good as possible.

Please, if you happen upon one of these posts, or if you take a walk through a whole bunch of them, let me know if you find anything that doesn't work. You can leave a comment, or you can send me a message using that handy "Contact Me" page linked above.

Also, feel free to let me know what you think of the post or any of the videos!

Thank you.

**************************

It's a grey and cloudy day here in Metro Vancouver, a Sunday morning that shows a hint of hope, a possibility of promise, and an anticipation of alliteration. It's a day where I gaze into my bowl of nuts and say to myself, "Charlie Sheen, are you in there?"

But enough of this facile and focused philosophy!

It's time for this week's edition of the One Hit Wonders of the 90s! That constant countdown of silly songs and tummy-tossing tunes! (Peanut Gallery: "Would you please STOP????")

It's 1992, the year I graduated college and inflicted myself onto the rest of the world. No need to thank me for that, and please don't blame Iowa State either. It didn't know the havoc it had unleashed.


Where was I? Oh yeah, the music! Let's see if this week's countdown is any better than last week's. It couldn't get much worse. Unless, you know, it developed a toe rash or something.

On to #1!

1) RTZ: "Until Your Love Comes Back Around" (#26)



I knew I recognized this song's name, though I couldn't place it. Now that I hear it, it's definitely one I remember. Lots of good piano at the beginning, before they go for the guitar/drum thing. This song definitely sounds like Boston...oh yeah, I guess that could be because RTZ has two Boston members in it! Who would have thunk it, huh?

Anyway, I remember liking this song well enough, and it's still not too bad. It doesn't really have anything in it that jumps out at you and says "I am good!" Then again, you don't really want the music you're listening to physically assaulting you, do you?

I hate when that happens.

2) MC Brains: "Oochie Coochie" (#21)

Why am I filled with dread?



Oh yeah, that's why.

What's with the little high note at the end of each verse in the beginning? That just sounds strange. If any song and video needed a zombie attack (BRAINS!!!!!), it's this one. I do find it funny how they talk about how it's their first hit...not realizing it will be their only one! Oh, irony, thy name is MC Brains!

It is nice that they credit their behind the scenes people at the end. How very kind of them.

That way, we know who to avoid in the future.

3) Kathy Troccoli: "Everything Changes" (#14)



Hey, it's Taylor Dane! At least the opening definitely sounds like it. She's got quite the opening scream there, doesn't she? Oh, it's the old "Japanese tourists all have cameras" joke! Isn't that a thigh-slapper? Where's my barf bag. Didn't that go out with the 90s? Oh yeah, I guess this is the 90s, isn't it? Still, no excuse. They're probably wanting to get pictures of those ugly outfits.

I do remember this song, and I remember actually kind of liking it.

But what did I know? I was in college. I was overworked, tired, and didn't know what I was doing!

Actually, it's still not *too* bad, but Troccoli should have been told that, if you sound like you're from the 80s, you're not going to succeed. More than once, anyway.

4) Chris Walker: "Take Time" (#29)



This actually isn't that bad of a song, though Walker shouldn't try and dance. He looks like Ralph Macchio in The Karate Kid there. Still, the song itself is pretty good, in that "Urban Contemporary" kind of way. It still sounded way too 80s, though, but in this case it worked.

It's funny how, despite saying that he's still active, Wikipedia doesn't give any indication of what he's doing now, or what he did after he disappeared from the charts. Does anyone know?

Bueller? Bueller?

5) Cause & Effect: "You Think You Know Her" (#38)



Oh my God, he's channelling Depeche Mode!!! And badly, too. And he's getting spastic! You'd think those other musicians would go help him instead of blindly going on playing their music. Maybe they're not that close. I know I'm getting motion sickness watching this video.

You know, there just aren't enough women walking the streets in their underwear. The world would be a better place if that improved.

This isn't that bad of a song, at least not in an eardrum-threatening way. It's perfectly bland, kind of annoying, and sounds like a better band.

But other than that, it's fine.

6) Joe Public: "Live and Learn" (#4)



If I followed this song's advice, I'd probably stop these one-hit wonders posts right now. Sadly, I didn't before hearing this song again. This song made it to #4? Did the public suffer some kind of mass hallucination, one that told them that this was good?


Whew, that feels better.

7) Liddell Townsell & M.T.F": "Nu Nu" (#26)



You know what takes talent? Taking a typical daily activity, like sitting outside and ogling all of the gorgeous women walking by (vocally, and not having them come back and slap you) and turning it into a hit song! I wish I had that kind of talent.

How many of those women would run screaming, call the cops or knee the guy in the crotch if they weren't getting paid for this video?

I'm thinking, oh, maybe 80%? Oh, and don't forget the 15% who would do that because they were forced to listen to this song. That leaves just the 5% perverts and masochists who would actually *enjoy* this.

Is it time for this torture to stop? Why yes, yes it is. Don't think you're off the hook now, though. I'll need you for my moonlighting job.



Don't worry, this won't hurt a bit.  Well, not much, anyway.  Hey, you could be forced to come back for next week's installment instead!  You should be thankful.

*********
Incidentally, is anybody else as freaked out as I am that, in the course of looking for that executioner image, I found this?


Ah yes, show your kids the wonders of History, by dressing them up as an Oliver Twist street urchin, or a Pilgrim, or a Tudor boy, or a FREAKIN' EXECUTIONER!!!!

Yeah, that won't twist some minds.



One-Hit Wonders of the 90s
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
Part 8
Part 9
Part 10
Part 11
Part 12
Part 13
Part 14
Part 15
Part 16
Part 17
Part 18
Part 19
Part 20
Part 21
Part 22
Part 23
Part 24
Part 25
Part 26
Part 27
Part 28
Part 29
Part 30
Part 31
Part 32
Part 33
Part 34
Part 35
Part 36
Part 37
Part 38
Part 39
Part 40

5 comments:

  1. Once again I didn't know any of them. I kind of liked number 5. The beat was good but the video was bad. It started off great . Liked number one. Number 3 was not to bad but that women has a big mouth (literally).Number 4 I wrote not to bad. He had an unusual sounding voice.It was really a lot better this week then last. Keep them coming.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ok after the first couple you seriously had me thinking "what the hell, did I sleep through a decade?", and then I got kathy Troccoli, and yes sounds like Taylor Dane.

    Only recognized a couple more vaguely, and was fun to see and hear them!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Mom: I would be surprised if you *do* know any of them, but I'm glad you actually kind of liked a couple. :)

    Brahm: Glad to see somebody agrees with me! Just listening, I would have sworn that was Taylor Dane.

    And no, you didn't sleep through a decade. You've just got better taste than to have ever listened to these songs. :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. I thought we were in 1992...why is hoochie coochie there? What an annoying song, up until now I had never heard of it & now it's stuck in my head. Ugh!

    Maybe "Live & Learn" made it far because of the lyrics? Not sure but I don't remember it.

    #7 sounded somewhat like Boyz II Men, only a crappy version.

    Hmm I only know #3.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I was wondering that myself, but it is listed as a 1992 one-hit wonder. Thankfully, I successfully resisted it becoming stuck in my head.

    Unfortunately, I have #3 stuck there.

    ReplyDelete

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